


Winter Soldier & Phoenix

by Mai_girl_2001



Category: Avengers (Comics), Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Falling In Love, I Don't Even Know, Kidnapping, Love, Memory Loss
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:48:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29751558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mai_girl_2001/pseuds/Mai_girl_2001
Summary: OC/Reader woke up with memory loss. Turns out she’s an avenger and married to Bucky Barnes.Who is she? How did she end up here?  She's on the discovery and hopefully recovers her memories.Would she still fall in love with Bucky Barnes?
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Original Female Character(s), James "Bucky" Barnes & Reader, James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character(s), James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader
Kudos: 9





	1. What happened?

I woke up and realized a lot of noises of people shuffling around but I was in so much pain. I felt the electric current rushing through my body and how it’s concentrated in my brain. The doctor was trying to control the situation. I was screaming in agony and I couldn’t believe that I’m still alive. 

One man with a burnt face was smiling as I screamed in pain and he said “Don’t worry! She will be ready in no time. Can’t wait for Winter Soldier’s reactions. Now let’s go before they come.”

The doctors were still wiping me 

Soon after people were rushing into the room.

Explosions happened and then doctors were running out of the room hoping to find coverage. 

I heard commotion enter the room and soon the chair that was electrocuting me stopped. 

Soon after, I felt someone’s hands reach for my face and asked “Y/N, are you okay? Stay with me, baby! We got you! Steve, I found her!”

I heard lots of sounds and gunshots but I felt so exhausted so I ended up passing out.

I was drifting in and out of my slumber. 

I was being carried onto a plane. I was placed on a flat surface and I heard screaming then back to blackness. 

The next day, I woke up feeling a lot better.

I realized I was in a medical facility. I looked around and my head was still hurting. I was groaning and then a man came towards me asking me “Are you okay? How are you feeling? Friday, call for Bruce and Helen.”

I winced and responded, "head hurts!" He got up and pressed the buttons and screamed "Friday, get Bruce and Helen now!"

The room got crowded with help but I noticed the man who was trying to help me had a metal arm, brown hair, and blue eyes. He looked really concerned.

After a bunch of tests, they went through everything. I was told that I survived from Hydra testing, experiment, and the crazy chair that takes away memories. 

The lady named Helen, asked me "Do you know who you are? Do you remember us?"

I looked at everyone and felt confused. I answered "No! I don’t know who I am… and who you guys are. There's familiarity but I can't remember my name. My head hurts when I try to recall..."

They explained to me that the terrorist group named Hydra kidnapped me. I'm an avenger who is married to James Buchanan Barnes. They captured me and tried to erase who I am so I can be molded to become a soldier for them to control. 

I was shocked and then asked, "Where’s my husband?"

The man who I saw earlier was James based on his flinching reaction. I looked at him as he stared at me with a hurtful and shocking reaction.

We were given time and space as the doctors told me I'm cleared to go back to our suite and they will keep an eye on me. I’ll return to the medical bay for daily check-ups.

James brought in photos of us. He wanted to prove that he's my husband. He got Friday to pull up photos of the two of us. Who I was and who he is. 

Friday played a video montage of our wedding day with our friends. 

James held my hands in front of our friends and said his vows “I promise you to love you more each day and hold your hand through the ups and downs. I shall spend the rest of my days to be worthy of your love. I’ll be with you until the end of the line. Sorry, Steve!” Everyone in the video was laughing and soon it followed with group photos and intimate images of me and him. We both looked really happy.

I couldn’t feel anything but at least I know I can trust him.

I asked him “Do we have other family members?”

James confirmed “No! Just the two of us. You came into the group because you have some special powers.”

I asked “What? I do?”

James smiles and says “You can move objects like Wanda. I’ll explain later as today has been rough for you. Let’s rest and not rush. I know how it’s like to be in the chair and what it does to your mind.”

We sat and talked. James was very caring and he didn’t want to rush holding me knowing that I’m only getting comfortable slowly. He explained the years he was under control through Hydra. To this day, we are still fighting Hydra but I was kidnapped for a week. He apologized profusely over it and wished he could have been there for me. 

He looked like he hated himself. I couldn’t help but walk up to him to hug him as he was standing across from me trying to calm himself. It was on instinct. As I hugged him, he held me and cried. 

I tell him “It’s okay James! It’s not your fault. Don’t blame yourself. I’m safe now.”

James broke down as he heard my words. He knew that us getting married was going to bring more risk to me. Hydra was going to do whatever they can to get a hand on me knowing it would hurt him. Here I am, still trying to console him even though I don’t remember him.

Bucky wanted to tell me to call him ‘Bucky’ not ‘James’ but he hoped someday, I would remember him and call him Bucky. He would hope that day comes soon. Right now, I’m a clean slate and he was going to win me back. 

After hugging, James felt better. We started to get ready to leave the medical bay.

He took me to our room and I noticed more photos of us. James placed 2 boxes full of cards, pictures, gifts, and other gifts so I can go through them. Get familiar with him. 

Soon I was reintroduced to every avenger; Nat, Steve, Tony, Thor, Wanda, Sam, vision, Clint, and so on. 

In the next 2 months, we fell into routines. I asked to move to a guest suite while I got myself familiar with being avengers. James was respectful and made sure the guest suite was next to his so he could keep an eye out for me. 

I was learning how to do things again. My name was Y/N. I have powers that I can’t seem to unlock yet. I worked with Avengers and they are my family. I fell in love with James Buchanan Barnes and got married to him after 1 year of dating him. 

Every day, I was training and Wanda would help me control my powers. We started baby steps moving a cup of water then moved bigger objects. 

James never left my side unless he had a mission. We both were getting used to each other’s presence. Steve called James “Bucky” which I noticed but he never asked me to call him that. I kept calling him, James. 

We had meals together and soon Nat was teaching me self-defense moves, James was teaching me how to shoot. They worried about me not being able to defend myself. Apparently, I was very good in the field.

I had to admit that Steve was cute and Sam was charming. I know I'm married to James whom I think is pretty hot but we haven't been physically close. Now we sleep in separate rooms until   
I'm comfortable with him again. I can tell he's a little hurt from our distance but he tries every day. 

Bringing me my favorite desserts to recall memories or take me out to places where it brings significant moments of our relationship. 

The nights I have nightmares, James would come into my room to hold me. We would sleep in the same bed where it starts with us on each side of the bed but by the next morning I'm in his arms somehow but we haven't kissed or done anything. He's very respectful. He kissed my forehead but no other intimate ways. I enjoyed the warmness and patience. 

Nat decided to change things up and let me spar with her instead of lessons. She now wants to see how I will deal in real situations. 

As she circles me and starts to come at me, I manage to move away and Dodge. I even counterattack when I wanted to and for some reason, it felt like I knew what I was doing. Natural instincts and reflexes. I managed to grab her and pushed her down on the mat and pin her down.

I wasn't sure how this works. Soon Nat calls over Steve to go at me. We were moving and I noticed he pinned me down easily but I managed to do the same. It shocked me at how fast I was able to take down Captain America.

Everyone cheered and Nat said “I guess Y/N is still there. Steve keep going!”

I realized how close I was with Steve so I started peeling myself off of him. I noticed James was growling. I turned to him and he looked upset but tried to dismiss it given the fact Steve is his best friend. 

Bucky reminded steve: “Jerk, try not to take advantage of my wife!”

Steve laughs and says: “Punk, she just pinned me. I think she's taking advantage of me.”

I scuffed and followed Nat to the changeroom. 

Steve got up and said, “Jerk, I didn't hurt her.”

Bucky says “Don't touch her punk!”

Steve sighs “We were sparring and she can still kick my ass.”

Bucky scoffs “Many of us can kick your ass.”

Steve shook his head in defeat “Hey! Stop being so jealous. No one is trying to steal her away.”

Bucky turns to Steve “wanna spar?”

Bucky needed to get it out of his system. The stress has gotten to him and I’ve kept my distance. We felt like strangers and he didn’t like it. 

Steve says “Bring it on Jerk!” they began to spar.

I watched them after I showered. James was very calculative, precise and he made it hard for Steve however Steve handled it like a champ. I sat and watched. It was amazing to watch them go at it. 

Soon, I went upstairs to get some snacks from the kitchen. The ladies wanted to gather today for a girl’s night out. We are planning to go shopping for an upcoming party and socialize. 

As I got to the kitchen, Thor and Loki came from the balcony. 

Thor smiled and came towards me to talk “Lady Y/N, it's so nice to see you again.”

I looked at him and smiled but couldn't recognize him or the man next to him. 

I explained, "Hi! I'm sorry I don't recall who you both are..!"

Wanda explained to them right away about what happened to me and hydra. 

Loki reaches out with his hand and says "I can help Y/N!"

I tried to move away but it was too late. Loki had his hand on my head and soon the memories were coming back. 

It was like walking into a vault. Inside were memories. 

I grew up with no parents. I was taken by a group of people who foster me, train me to become a good thief, I was very good at conning, lying, and tricking people but I mainly steal from the rich to feed the poor. I found out I can control electricity by turning off power if I touched the nearest outlets of wires. I can push electric power towards evil people which caught the Hydra and shield's attention. I was recruited to become an avenger and soon I fell in love with James. We shared many moments. James changed for the good and soon we got married. I was pregnant when Hydra took me. They tried to keep me so I can give them a Hydra soldier. The pain of losing the child was so powerful because I tried to break free and run away. The men who recaptured me thought it was smart to catch me by electrocuting me. I was in my first trimester. I almost didn't survive the damages and they tried to wipe me. The stress and pain made me miscarry the child. 

Loki didn’t realize what he was unleashing until it was already happening. He watched my memories and even he, himself felt the pain, sadness, and loss.

I screamed as the pain ripped through my head and the memories unleashed what my subconscious tried to hide from me. Our child was gone and I failed to protect our child.

I unleashed my powers as the wave of electricity blasted Thor and Loki backward. I made the tower turn off everything for at least 30 seconds. I was on my knees, crying and wishing it would end differently.

I blacked out. Loki rushed to my side and told Thor "She's suffered so much. I'm going to kill those men!"

He held me up and knew they needed to go to Bruce. 

Soon Friday and the building was back to normal. 

Thor and Loki took me to the medical bay.


	2. Past & Present

Friday was back online. Tony was figuring everything out.

Soon enough, Friday notifies Steve and Bucky that Y/N was in the medical bay.

Bucky rushed there. He saw Thor and Loki standing outside.

Thor says “Brother, you shouldn’t have recalled all her memories like that.”

Loki said, “I was only trying to help her!”

Bucky reached for Loki’s neck as they both come face to face. 

Bucky screams “What did you do to her?”

Steve pushes Bucky back while Thor grabs a hold of Loki. They moved both the men apart.

Bucky screams “What the fuck did you do Loki? How many times do I have to tell you to stop touching my wife?”

Loki screams back “I was just trying to help!”

Wanda walked into the room after leaving my side as she cries “Y/N wanted to repress those memories. Bucky, she was pregnant when they took her. She lost the child and she knows now.”

Bucky was crying because he failed her. He remembered that day when I got kidnapped. He was on a mission. I was excited to tell him something but I never got a chance to because I got kidnapped. It took him half a day later to find out I was missing.

As soon as they recollected me over a week later, he knew the child was gone when Dr. Helen Cho confirmed it. Since I lost my memories, he didn’t want me to live through the pain. 

Loki says “I’m sorry!”

Bucky punches Loki which lands him on the ground.

Loki says “I deserved that.”

Wanda says “Loki, if we wanted to recall the memories, we would have. I would have been able to but Bucky wanted to give Y/N some time to adjust and heal.”

Loki stood up and said “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to…”

Dr. Cho came out of the room and I was sleeping after they injected the dose.

Wanda says “I helped Y/N to make it less painful for her because she looked like she was watching a movie reel of herself. Y/N isn’t exactly herself yet but she will soon recover.”

Dr. Cho confirms “She’s sedated at the moment. We need to keep her emotions in check. That power surge could have been deadly. Wanda was able to repress her emotions.”

Wanda adds “I changed her perspective like she was watching her memories like a movie. She’s not tied to the emotions. We feared for the worst if she returned to her formal self because she can’t control her powers. Have you guys noticed her powers grown?”

Loki nods and said “She was able to take out the entire building. We need to ask Tony.”

Steve came into the room with Tony.

Tony asks “What happened to Thunderbolt?”

Thor smiles “I’m good!”

Tony says “Pointbreak is your name” (pointing at Thor) and he points at me “she’s Thunderbolt or lightning rod!”

Thor huffs “I’m a god!” But Tony glares back as Wanda explains what happened.

Tony confirms “Y/N managed to wipe out a grid of electricity. I’ve never seen her do that before.”

Loki tells everyone what he saw in the memories and what Hydra did. Bucky punched the wall with his metal arm. He knew the end result but he didn’t know the full details until Loki shared it.

Steve pats Bucky’s back “She’s here with us. We will protect her.”

Loki spoke up “I’m sorry for causing this. What have you got on Hydra? I’ll help you locate them. They deserve to get killed for what they did to her. I want to make them pay.” Everyone can tell Loki was angry and no one messes with an angry god.

Steve saw Bucky looked sad.

Steve tells Loki “We followed every lead possible but we can’t find them.”

Loki turns to Bucky “Let her wear my necklace, I’ll be able to track her when she calls for help.”

Bucky turned to Loki and there’s a storm in his eyes because he felt conflicted. He wanted to keep me safe but he really didn’t want Loki’s help, after all, Loki and I dated for a brief time that’s why I still have Loki’s necklace. A gift that I didn’t get rid of and Bucky hated to see it which is why I rarely wore it around Bucky. Bucky looked defeated for not being able to keep me safe.

Steve spoke up for his best friend “Loki, she’s not leaving the tower. We have a lot of security…”

Loki grunts “She was kidnapped under your noses. Don’t tell me about how safe this place was or else she wouldn’t have gotten hurt. Is her safety not a concern?”

Bucky looked down in disappointment and he simply agreed with the green-eyed god “I’ll ask her to wear it. Right now, we all agree her safety is first.”

Tony can see Bucky’s dilemma and he adds “I’ll build something to help track her.”

Loki answers “I’ve enchanted her necklace. If she calls for me, I would be able to appear next to her when she summons me.”

Tony simply adds “In case you’re off worlds again. I’ll add a tracker chip just in case.”

Everyone dispersed into their rooms and Bucky stayed by my side.

___________________________________

~ Recalling how I met Bucky Barnes ~ 1.5 years before our marriage

Natasha says “If you can find Bucky, I’ll let you dare me, Steve and Sam.”

I added, “And Clint!”

She rolled her eyes as she dropped me off at Bucharest. We hacked into the database of Hydra and I skimmed through the photos and noticed a few things. We know that Bucky Barnes has been under the radar. Every time Steve got close to tracking him, he would be on the run.

I had money, fake passports, and was able to get in and out of the city. He wasn’t easy to find but I had Friday’s help.

I would hack into the best security systems in the city and plugin Friday to do all the work. It took her a while to locate potential matches. I was given 6 spots to try.

I went to the farmers market where I noticed the fruit stand where people were buying items. I noticed the plums. I asked the lady if I could buy all of them. She stared at me and was surprised knowing that there’s a regular customer who comes to buy them.

I had Friday in my ear so she helped me say words in Romanian and then I smiled to say “I’m buying it for a friend. The man with the cap.”

She smiles and says “Yes the young gentleman! He’s usually here around this time.”

I saw young children nearby as I gave most of them away before I headed to the bench knowing Bucky is following me.

I sensed him near and purposely walked to the farmer’s market, I sat down by a bench facing the nice beautiful water with a basket of plums.

Bucky wanted to keep to himself but I spoke softly knowing that he can hear me while others don’t “You could just sit. I don’t bite.”

Bucky didn’t know why he moved towards me when his mind told him it wasn’t safe. His body had its mind of its own as he approaches me by the bench. He sat down and didn’t say anything.

I pushed the basket to him and said “I’m Steve’s friend. Part of the Avengers.”

Bucky wanted to get up to leave.

I said, “I’m here to convince you to join us.”

Bucky felt relaxed enough to sit back and said “I’m not a hero.”

I didn’t even look at him when I spoke “You don’t need to be one. Your knowledge about Hydra can help us.”

Bucky shook his head and said “I can’t help anyone. I’ll bring harm to those around me.”

I reminded him “As long as you’re here by yourself, I think you’re tempting for Hydra to collect their Winter Soldier back. They can still hurt people but if you helped us take them down. We could save a lot of people. Don’t you want to take them down?”

I turned to him this time and for the first time in my life, my heart skipped a beat. Something about him. His eyes convey loss, confusion, and pain.

Initially, he felt I was a confident woman coming here to recruiting him back but then my eyes and the look on my face softens. Something made him felt like he trusts me.

I smiled and said “If you want to live here, I can get you set up with documents and erase traces of you. Steve has been looking for you. I’m not sure if you remember but he’s your best…”

Bucky looked at me and said “best friend. I only started to remember over the past year. It’s not very pretty.” as he gestured his brain was messed up.

I tell him “We can help if you want our help. You don’t have to be alone.” I knew how it felt to be alone with my powers. People try to take advantage of you and sometimes, you felt alone in this world.

Just as I was looking at him, I noticed some movement behind him. I’m pretty positive it was Hydra but I can’t be sure.

I touched his hand and said “We have company, get closer. I have a gun strapped to my thigh.”

Bucky sensed them and realized that he was so distracted that he forgot to notice his surrounding.

He moved closer to me and placed the basket of plums on the other side of the bench. 

His right hand moved closer to my cheek as if we were lovers. I was confused about what role I was playing because his touch gave me butterflies. His left hand reached for my knee and I felt the cool metal. 

It caused my breath to hitched but then he dips for my lips while reaching under my dress to get the gun.

His kiss was soft and it was passionate as he thought it would be the only time he would be able to kiss a woman.

He left me breathless as he grabbed for the gun. And we both got up as he held my hand and we ran.

Bucky tells me “Let’s go, doll!”

Ever since then he hasn’t let go of my hand. We both have been attached to the hips since. 

Flashes of intimate memories came at me. Nights when Bucky couldn’t sleep, we hung out in the kitchen for some tea and hot chocolate. He and I would cuddle up to watch TV and his hand was on my knee. 

We didn’t try to have sex until Loki returned and tried to win over my affection. 

Bucky was jealous and upset at Loki. A lot of insecurities came up and Bucky thought he wasn’t worthy of my love until I cornered him trying to communicate with him. He looked delicious in his suit as we attended the party that night. Women tried to hit on him but he didn’t look at them but me. We both were frustrated.

I was jealous of the women around him and he was jealous of Loki.

I pulled him into a kiss and told him “I love you! You’re such an idiot!”

One thing lead to another, we took off our clothes and we shared our first night of passion.

Poor Steve had to hear a lot of love-making noises throughout the night.

________________________________

~ back to the present 

I opened my eyes and I see the bright lights as I breathed in all the information that got thrown at me. I can remember my identity but then my feelings felt different. I wasn’t crying in pain.

I see Bucky’s concern face as I slowly get up. I grabbed for him “Bucky!”

Bucky smiled and he was surprised when he heard me called for his name.

We hugged one another and I tell him “I’m sorry I lost it.”

He shook his head and said “We lost…” he was crying.

I touched his face and I can feel something is very familiar. 

I asked him “Why do I feel so strange? I feel…Ahhh...:”

There were walls surrounding my heart like something is trying to compress my feelings into a box. 

Just then I felt my hands glowed blue. I pushed Bucky away and said, “Get out!”

Bucky screams “No!”

I saw Wanda approached the room and I sent her a mental note to take Bucky away. I can’t control my powers. Turn off the electricity.

Wanda used her powers to drag Bucky out of the room and then the doors slams shut.

Tony, Thor, Loki, Bruce, Helen, Natasha, Clint, Sam, and others came to the scene to see my powers try to reach all the outlets and I tried to contain it. I could cause things to explode and I knew I didn’t want to cause destruction. 

Loki asks “What is happening?”

Wanda says “Something awoken from her. She’s getting stronger and she can’t control her powers.”

Everyone was wondering what was going to happen. I was absorbing too much electricity and it felt like I wanted to explode. 

Loki appears in front of me. I screamed “No Loki!”

Loki grabs a hold of my hand and he opens a portal to take me away.

I can hear Bucky screaming “No! Loki, let her go!”

The Portal closes. Loki took me somewhere.


End file.
